Schoolgate Style? Tribal........

I'm not talking about a new fashion trend.  I am an older mum.  I was ecstatic to give birth, to my darling daughter, at the age of (just) 40.  She was a delightful and most welcome gift.  I was convinced that I would remain childless.  I had many invasive and unpleasant tests to see if it was 'me' that was faltering.  My Husband had to produce a semen sample.  THAT WAS IT.  How unfair (wanker, literally!)  As I headed towards the age of 40 I was starting to become desperate.  I took pills, I had a course of acupuncture and made the husband shag me at every available moment ( when ovulating, obviously.)  Nothing.  NADA. Zilch, for many a month that dragged on into many a year.  I had a couple of miscarriages but they were 2 years apart.  What was going on?  I simply think that between us,  my husband, and I, were plainly sub-fertile.  Nothing was technically wrong although my cilia were compromised.  Now they are the little hairs that populate the Fallopian tubes and usher the egg, on it's travels, down to the womb.  It was my fault then. Maybe.  I hit the cut off.  It was Christmas 2007 and I thought to myself that if I didn't conceive by the New Year I would not be able to have a child before I turned 40.  I decided to give up, get fit and enjoy my Skiing holiday booked for the February.  I totally forgot about getting pregnant. Low and behold when I was on that ski holiday I was, indeed, about 3 weeks pregnant.  The body is an amazing thing.  During the holiday I really didn't feel like getting absolutely mullered, as was the norm, but took to drinking a hot chocolate and having a kip at around 4.30pm.  Yes, Apres Ski, get totally pissed as a fart time.  Not for me, the need for an afternoon nap was overwhelming. As I say, the body is an amazing piece of kit!  I returned home, from a fantastic week of skiing, to go on a buying trip.  At the time we were still running the ladies clothing shop we owned in Sandbach.  I. FELT. LIKE. SHIT.  I was full of cold but it dawned on my that my period was overdue.  Could it be? Yes, yes, yes.

I experienced a relatively uneventful pregnancy and a reasonably straightforward birth.  We did have a touch and go moment when the salad servers were required and an episiotomy was called for.  I was a bit out of it by this stage so really could not have cared less.  If they had turned up with farm equipment I would have been as happy as Larry.   I was besotted when the little one was born.  I really could not believe that I was a mum.  I am not mumsy in the slightest, you know the clucky women who attract children to their ample bosoms. Not me at all. Over the years I have learnt, grown and I am still learning.  Every day is a challenge but one that I am up for.  A bigger challenge has been the school politics.  Fuck Me, what a nightmare.  I thought I had left the bullies behind many moons ago. HOW WRONG WAS I! Giving birth, in comparison, was a breeze.

Do you remember when a lot of blogs ran with the theme of 'schoolrunstyle' or 'schoolrunmum?'  No wonder they re-branded.  What a pit of poo.  I would not want to be associated with the school run on my blog.  Den of vipers.  I have to say, as a disclaimer,  I have quite a few glorious friends that I have met at school but a lot of them are the rummest I have ever come across and I have had my fair share of run ins.  I have been googling the 'gangs' of mothers that appear at the school gates but I have to disagree with what has been catalogued.  I find that the alpha mums are not necessarily the high flying, immaculate mothers.   Far from it.  Some of the Alphas almost look like they are under the radar.   I am one of the mums that makes an effort.  I do it because I want to.  I like to look nice and be ready for the day.  I get up early, sort everything out for my daughter and wear something that makes me feel good.  I don't always have a reason.  Quite often I am at home for the day but I like to use the clothes that I have and it makes me feel better.  I try and smile and I try to be a nice person.  Sometimes being nice gets you absolutely fucking nowhere, trust me.  I will continue to try to be nice though.  My focus is my daughter.  She sometimes finds friendships and school life hard and it breaks my heart that the reality is that this shit can continue into adulthood. It should not be like this but there is no accounting for others behaviour.  Some of them are still stuck at being seventeen themselves.  The 'head girl, mean girl' crappy mentality. They need to GROW UP.  It's a good job that I am now totally confident in myself and my true friendships. I feel sorry for the mothers who don't have the confidence that I do.  It is a minefield and if you are about to enter into this stage, in your' life, my advice would be to keep your' head down and smile.


Now, how about fashion?  Lets look at how things develope over many months.  I started taking the clothes 'selfies' years ago.  I do look back and cringe a bit.  It really has taken a long time to master the technique and I am still learning.  I just like putting things together.  It is part of me and whether it is school run cool or not I will continue to do it.  I am a school run mum that decides to look half decent in the morning. End of.  Having said that most would think I look a scruff bag, judging by the photos below.  I guess that is the fashion in 2018.  I don't know what my Mother in Law would have made of the ripped jean look.  She was super fashionable but in a very classic way.  Certainly doing the original blog and then jumping onto Instagram has helped with my confidence and self esteem.  Funnily enough the photos below are about as dressed down as I get!

School Run Mum ready to do battle.  (I am joking.)

Shopping my wardrobe and hugging an old and very faithful Prada bag.

In the beginning we had crap poses and blurred photos.  It all takes time, oh yes. And how I laugh at the detritus in the background.  You live and learn! 

We'll just leave those there.  I have had so much fun, over the past 6 or 7 years but it is only recently that I am completely comfortable with my own style.  Good things come to those who wait, I guess.

Now we have the run up to Christmas.  Keep warm and safe. Helen XxX

WHY?

Being half a century old usually means excusing myself using the reason for stupidity and, quite frankly, bizarre occurrences being down to the menopause.  I don't even know if I am actually experiencing the menopause but I can't think what else it could be.  Being forgetful, cantankerous and impatient are the top three at the moment with tearful following closely behind.  Ageing doesn't worry me.  I am a bit vain, but no more than most.  I still feel fairly youthful and, thank the lord, my sense of humour is intact (although this is pushed to the limit every morning with the school run and certain tools at school!)  I digress.  What this post is about is the strange and wonderful thing that is posting on Instagram daily.

My Instagram is mainly clothing and fashion based.  Occasionally the odd dog makes an appearance and very occasionally you may see a member of my family (shy lot!). I do it for the fun of it and, as I have said before, if I didn't I would slink back into wearing Ugg boots, jeans and a plain jumper/T shirt (weather dependant) all the damn time.  I live in the middle of nowhere and would end up talking to myself.  I have great interaction with a large number of fellow, like minded Instagrammers. In short,  I bloody love it.

I am part of a WhatsApp group, too, and there has been murmurings of late that the dreaded algorithms are all over the shop.  A lot of us are experiencing a loss of followers and a dip in engagement.  Now please don't think that this is something I'm obsessed with, it is not.  I merely note that funny things seem to be going on and when your' working hard to develope a genuine, friendly, following it upsets the applecart. I am not alone and I have been informed that Instagram are having a clear out.  It looks like they are attempting to reduce the number of fake, and down right abnormal, accounts that have sprung up.  It should all settle down by mid December so I am keeping my fingers crossed.  I don't like not seeing accounts that I really do want to see on my feed.  I don't appreciate endless sponsored posts and adverts being bumped before the accounts I prefer seeing.  Anyway, there is bugger all we can do about it, I just get a bit bothered if friends think I have switched off.  This is not the case, I just don't always see their posts. Another thing that annoys the hormones in me!

Last night was an excuse to start the Christmas celebrations early.  Off to The Cholmodeley Arms with some school mums.  I was happy to be wearing my new T Shirt from a little company called Bypollyannaclothing.  I met Polly at a recent event at Black White Denim, in Wilmslow. A nicer person you'd be hard pushed to meet and I was most happy to order one of her t-shirts as soon as I returned home.  Another purchase on the day was one of the, soon to be, iconic sweaters by Kat Farmer X Orwell Austin.  The range, with True Colours emblazoned on the chest,  is a first collaboration for Kat and Orwell Austin.  The day highlighted the National Autistic Society with Kat poised to become a patron for them.   All  her profits from the sweater will be going straight to the society.  A noble gesture and a heartfelt one,  from Kat,  as she is passionate about the cause. The day was a total delight.  I took Helen (Simpson House) along with me, which made for a great chat session on the journey from Shropshire.  I finally met Jo, at Black White Denim and had a good mooch around the boutique.  It is just the right mix of edgy and classics.  Jo and the team are a delight. Finally,  I got to have a chat with Jess, the lady behind Orwell Austin.  One of the nicest, again, that you could wish to meet.  All this activity is because of Instagram.  Friends old and new.  A thumbs up from me.

Black White Denim

Disco Darling T Shirt £25.00

True Colours Sweater from Orwell Austin

Jess (Orwell Austin)

Kat, Helen (Simpson House) Jo (Black White Denim) 

Out Out.  Sorry it's a bit dark. 

All in all Instagram is about friendship and connection, for me anyway. All my School Mum friends are Insta active too because there is no getting away from it.  At least we have kicked off the countdown to Christmas.  There is nothing like starting early!!

Keep warm and well.  Helen XxX

The Holy Grail of Jeans?

Please don't shout or scream at me.  I have found, what I consider to be, the holy grail of the jean world.  They are MY holy grail.  They are not going to be everybody's holy grail.  They don't come cheap but I managed to snaffle a pair at a reduced price.  I don't think I could have pushed it had they been at their,  delightful and rather eye watering,  full price.  I know that the cost per wear thingamabob is going to come into it's own.  All bloggers natter on, endlessly, about cost per wear and I am going to be no different.  So sue me.  I know you get where I'm coming from.  I know that you think 'bloody hell' and all the other expletives but it is THE HOLY GRAIL after all.  If I were a crusader I would be sporting sunken cheeks and a very long beard, from years of searching.

• "How did I come to find such a gem?"  I hear you ask.  Well, as per, I was scanning many lovely instagrammers and noted this particular pair of jeans on at least 2 of them that particular session.  I call them sessions because they can be a short hit workout or a lengthy marathon depending on what I've got on and where I am.  This was a lengthier one and I did my research. Luckily the jeans were linked.  Oh how I love a link and how I bloody hate the lack of them when you find something that you desperately need!   The links sent me off to German websites but I am nothing if not canny.  I fathomed out the make and model and, voila, found them on the Flannels UK website.  It took a bit of searching, my fingers looked like bloodied stumps by the end of the day! (Not really, I am exaggerating,  but sometimes it really is worth putting in the extra effort!) 
• I am blaming Tania, with her daily outfits, at jagta8. Her style isn't identical to mine but I have definitely stolen a few ideas from her over the past few months.  She does have an effortless look and she can wear heels, something I fail miserably at.  If I wear heels,  higher than a kitten,  I look like I've lost my horse somewhere! Think Katie Price on a good day but with less makeup and fewer children. Yeeee ha.  I noticed them on Lieblingsstil too. I have followed them both for some time. 

jagta8

lieblingsstil

jagta8

lieblingsstil

• So what are my demands that, seemingly, have been delivered?  Firstly I want a mid rise, not a low rise, too annoying and too much muffin.  I don't want a high rise, they make my arse look like it's going on forever, even if the muffin becomes non existent!  So a nice, comfortable mid rise.  Secondly, I don't want too much elastane (I think it is elastane, correct me if I'm wrong.) Thirdly, I like to have a good colour of blue.  Not too pale, not too dark with the correct weight of denim.  Up forth is the need for a moderate amount of distressing.  I like a bit of distressing, I think it gives a bit of edge and it's a 'fuck you' to my mid century status.  Fifth on my list of requirements is that they hug the bottom but don't cause a camel toe and do not slide at the crotch.  If I wanted drop crotch, I would buy drop crotch! Harrumph.  And finally ........ they need to be the right length.   I have fairly short legs, so they need to finish at the correct point above my ankle.  These are cropped at just the right level and have a good taper rather than being really tight on the calf.  I think that's covered everything. 

•  Just call me Goldilocks. 

Dsquared Runaway Cropped Jeans. Flannels.

I just followed instructions and 'added to my bag'

• I have to admit to having some jeans, from Zara, that are not far off the mark but these trump them all. My Holy Grail of the 'Boyfriend' style are still my AG jeans from last year.  Why is it that the good ones, in my case, seem to have a higher **price tag?!? I guess that sometimes you really do get what you pay for.  Maybe? I am not always convinced by that statement. I have a shape that has greater needs.  If my legs went on forever and I had no arse I would care a lot less! 

• **The law of sod. 

Grey Sweater from Primark (AW18)
Belt. Old
Boots from Faith at Debenhams SS18

Sweater from Primark. AW18
Belt. Cobra Belts via The Horse of the Year Show 18
Boots from Zara AW18 (adore them and less than £40.00)
Bag from Topshop AW18

Zara Boots. Favourites.

Furry bag. It comes it 2 colours.

Sweater from Next.  Old
Bangle from All Saints. Old

• So there we have it.  I am very happy indeed, until something else gets into my head and takes may fancy.  Fickle, Moi?  Hell yes but I am trying to be good.  Have you found your' dream jeans?  Do you have so many requirements?  Is it almost impossible?  Can you remember when they used to say ladies with short legs need to wear bootcut?  PAH. 

Love and peace.  H xxx

My Instagram is -  instyle.by.helen 

Fresh at Fifty (Goodbye to Fashion40ish)

Well hello there and it's been a while.  Gone are the Fashion40ish days.  My old blog days seem like a distant memory.  It was a hobby that became untenable due to internet speeds of less than 1, I kid you not.  In this day an age a speed of less than 1!!! I then became totally committed to Instagram and I have built up a nice, organic, following of truly lovely people.  I have made many new friends and have managed to keep in touch with some old ones from the embryonic stages of blogging. Then, a few months ago, the gods shone a light on our little corner of Shropshire which enabled internet speeds of plus 25!! Praise be. 

• I don't think I will be a prolific blogger but I think it would be nice to have a space to add information that is up to date and relevant.  I adore doing my ramblings, on stories, and love the interaction it creates.  I really like having a laugh.  Fun is what it is all about an if you can't have a chuckle, at your' own expense, there is something seriously wrong.  I am now 50.  I can't quite believe it as I type it out. I don't feel 50 and when I compare myself to pictures of family members, at the same age, I don't look anything remotely like they did.  I'm not saying they looked bad, God no, but I just do not look like they did.  I think the idea of donning ripped jeans and leopard print coats would have been akin to asking them to pop a dressing gown on to nip to Kwik Save (showing my age there!!!) 
• So here I am.  I would like to think that I could help inspire and encourage other women, maybe of a similar age, there are no rules, to have a bit of a try on and a dress up.  Put white jeans with chunky boots, but trainers with dresses (I don't actually do that really, I look a bit of a tit, but I love the look.)  Go crazy and wear ripped jeans and put that leather biker on etc etc.  It is not groundbreaking stuff, it isn't original but some of it may work for you.  I have said, on many occasions, that I nick a lot of ideas from Instagram and Pinterest.  I have a plethora of boards dedicated to making my life easier with what the hell to wear. I save many images from Insta and refer to them on a daily basis.  It works.  I do not have model proportions.  I am 5'6 and a bit (the 'bit' is fucking important) and I am a size 8-10-or 12 depending on where I shop. I have feet that have grown to a size 6? (I Know) and I have a long back and, proportionately, short legs.  I have learnt how to take a reasonably good photograph by using just my iPhone 7 and an occasional bit of input from the tween in my life. I manage to con many that I have the legs of Elle Macpherson. 
• I will be mindful of what I buy.  To be fair I have been doing quite a lot of 'shopping in my wardrobe' rather than buying willy-nilly.  Although willy-nilly does come into it from time to time.  It's the Primark effect when you stand,  with a multitude of sins in front of you,  and simply cannot resist.  Ooh look, fab jumper, how much? ? ? Get it bought. 
• I have a growing following and I am now receiving some 'gifts' from smaller companies and outlets.  I assure you than I will not be prostituting myself to all and sundry.  I will work with products that I like, and would buy myself, and people with that I am happy to help along the way. 

• Well I've made a start.  I don't want to waffle on too much.  In a nutshell, I've started another, fairly straightforward, simple blog.  I'll let it develope.  If anyone has any ideas or tips for me then fire away.  Life is always about learning, even if you are half a century old. *GASP*

Love H x